-My Uncle Tom-

My Uncle Tom was a funny man. He was quirky, fun loving, and could always make me laugh. I have many fond memories, but one in particular stands out. One Christmas when I was probably 10 years old, very gullible, Tom arrives and comes up to my parent’s house carrying his shoebox and a small white jewelry box. (The shoebox was what he had packed for the long weekend – talk about a low maintainence/no fuss type of guy!) He comes in the house and has a very serious look on his face. I greet him and he lets me know that on his drive up he saw a really bad accident. He proceeds to tell me this story about the accident and how at the accident scene he found something. He holds out the white jewelry box and lifts the lid to show me a finger lying on the fluffy white cotton with blood around the base of the finger. I was shocked needless to say and for the entire day believed my uncle was walking around with a stranger’s finger in a box! Come to find out that Uncle Tom had cut a hole in the bottom of the box which allowed him to slide his finger in the box and all the gruesome blood I thought I was looking at was really Tabasco sauce! This is just one memory I have of my uncle. Another was him teaching me how to crack my nose. . .a lovely trick! I miss you Tom and can’t imagine/don’t want to imagine life without you, you are our family jokester and fun loving uncle. Who is going to be my sous chef at the holidays?! Believe me I am aware that my lemon meringue pies will not be as high of caliber without your amazing whisking skills that keep the eggs from scambling! I love you so much and miss you. xo --your niece Kaely

p.s. my all time favorite photo of Tom is the one where he is dancing @ my wedding! Someone posted it early on in the blog :)

Tom pics - including the classic tennis shot.

With beloved Rowboat

Tom's obituary (sure feels strange to type those words....)

Tom Heffernan died September 22, 2010 after experiencing severe chest pains.  He was fifty-eight years old.

Tom, a long time resident of Santa Rosa, went to Assumption Elementary School in San Leandro, St. Joseph's High in Alameda, Chabot College and Sonoma State University.  He was a brilliant scholar of the earth and her myriad inhabitants.  Tom was awed by the vastness of the land, the oceans, and the universe.  He cared intimately about the smallest plants, animals and insects. Tom was an avid biker, he read volumes, and loved passionate discussions into the wee hours of the morning.  He loved his friends, family and dogs.  Not necessarily in that order.  Tom was witty.  He was ridiculously funny.  Tom was intense and deep.  He could take a simple, inane task like organizing a monthly phone call system among his siblings and turn it into an insane marathon of hilarious emails that caught us up and had us waiting daily for each new message.

Tom often saw darkness in the future, but gave us hope.  We always wanted more of him.

Tom is survived by his three sisters and their families:  Lois Heffernan and David Bagnard, Garden Valley, Idaho; Jan and Mike Mannion of Camino, California, their son Kevin, their daughter Kaely, her husband Daniel and their son Finley; Ruth and Bert Pierroz of Sacramento and their sons Blair and Grady.  Survived also by Elizabeth Wilson, his partner.

For information regarding the Memorial Service on October 16th go to: tomheffernan.blogspot.com/ (which is here)  To RSVP for the memorial, please go here:  http://www.pingg.com/rsvp/fkxjyj5cjfj3zp4tn  

Donations in Tom's name can be made to:

Landpaths

618 4th Street (#217)

Santa Rosa, California

95404

Or..

The Milo Foundation - Animal Rescue

Here is the link to the Obit in the Press Democrat.

Zion pictures from Sandy Lemole

Sandy sent these pictures of her and Tom visiting Zion in 2007 and 2008.
So nice to see the beautiful places he got to go.

Early Tom

My name is Mark Sandeen...
I am Tom's second cousin, Tom was only five years older...with Lois, Jannie, Tom & Ruthie, Tom's sister's, we all grew up together...They lived in San Leandro, we in San Lorenzo.

I think to give some retrospective of the adult Tom, some people might find it interesting to know the young Tom...

My mom, let us know Tom should not be running around to much...Tom I think had asthma and used an inhaler...We only lived ten miles or so from the Heffernans, and we would get together for trips to the beach, Yosemite, camping in Oregon, and their cabin in Arnold. They were always great fun...

Anyway, I was 6 and Tom was 11...Aunt Mary, Tom and Ruthie were over our house, and all the kids were out playing baseball in the court. There was this kid Peter Anderson, about Toms age...Mom said Peter always had a chip on his shoulder, and this day Peter had it out for me.....I was on the other team, and he struck out, I said something I probably shouldn't have said... so, Peter started to beat me up....

Well....Tom, my BIG cousin immediately came to my rescue and without any hesitations...He grabs Peter, threw him off me and started pushing him away.
Tom the STUD, .. I think I was more surprised than Peter...Peter would not fight Tom, and I guess it was because no one ever stood up to him before. But that day , Tom, my Cousin, became my hero.

Tom stayed one of my hero's in life as we grew older, but it was for his other attributes...He loved his family, and his family loved him. Tom was really special to us, and I wish I could have saved him like he saved me...I will never forget you Tom. Love Mark

Tom and his sisters

Tom, Lois, Ruth, Jan

and Durry

The husbands:

Dave, Lois's husband,   Burt, Ruth's husband,   Mike, Jan's husband

   

  

From Tom's teacher at SSU - Steve Norwick

I was very saddened to hear of Tom’s death. Like so many people, I had not
seen him in a long time. I had just asked Marty Roberts for Tom’s phone
number about 3 weeks ago, and I was going to call him, of course, but I
had not for all those reasons. I do not know how many of his teachers
remember him. He was not very talkative in the classroom or on a field
trip. Even at a party, he did not open up much to the faculty members. And
you must remember that in the days of the CORE, with the exception of Ken
Stocking, the faculty were only a few years older than the students. It
was only years later, at parties and chance meetings, that I got to know
Tom at all. I discovered he was a searcher, something that I admire
although I am not one, or so I claim. He read widely and somewhat
indiscriminately, or so it seemed to me. I also read widely, though I
always pretend there is method in my breadth of interests. We always had
something interesting to talk about. I remember how I tried to explain how
the CORE’s interest in complex feedback systems had caused me to change
from being a stochastic computer modeler to a deterministic computer
modeler, and I now teach a course and have written a textbook on the
subject. Though it sounds strange to say it, Tom was quite funny about
this somehow, the only time I can say we joked around.

I have learned a lot of things I did not know about Tom reading your
comments here. I am happy to hear about his sense of humor and his
animated side. He was almost always very reserved with me, and I always
sensed (it seems incorrectly) a great sadness in him, which I interpreted
as his fear for nature in this world that is exploding in so many
directions and so many ways. I am coming to think that I was wrong about
his mood. Certainly I was wrong about his mood around other people.

I had asked Marty R. for Tom’s contact information because I was thinking
about so many environmental things at once, I wanted to see how he would
have balanced all those things for himself. I am not sure just why of all
the students I have taught since 1965, I wanted to talk to Tom, but I did.
Perhaps, it was because he seemed to be looking for environmental truths
in such a different way from me. I am not sure, and now I will never know.
But I missed seeing him one last time, and I will miss him as long as I
can in this world.

Steve Norwick