Tom's eulogy in its entirety. jan

This is what was written in one of his many journals.

Tom’s eulogy that he wrote August 26^th, 1993 at 3:15 p.m.

I would like to acknowledge in Tom a person who showed us all that fundamental character change is possible. From the time 3 or 4 years ago when he started to get a “handle” on the process of self-knowledge, self-acceptance, and self-love until his death a few days ago, he demonstrated remarkable personal growth. He developed from a person who lacked spontaneity, inspiration, compassion, conviction, honesty and joy of life, into a compassionate person of great integrity who lived a principled life full of conviction and decisiveness. He became a person who was always in touch with his own deep, inestimable value, and as such, always acted from a calmness grounded in his deepest, clearest, most authentic self. He became a truly happy person who smiled and laughed easily & often. In his own easy way he lifted our spirits & helped us to feel valuable. He always seemed to assign a higher priority to hearing and understanding others than on being heard & understood himself.

He was far from perfect. He was continuously dealing with his laziness – his tendency towards entropy. He would reach a new plateau of growth and acceptance feeling on top of the world only to slip back to his old ways of not tending to his life, in the moment. But he grew to the point where he did not feel defeated by his lapses – he always knew there was a solid core of integrity within him – so…he would unabashedly recommit himself to his goal of becoming a person of solid, principled character. He did not let his mistakes drag him down, and as time went by he recovered from those hellish times more and more and more quickly and they recurred less and less often – his values & principles were sinking deeper & deeper into his being. It became easier for him to think and act in congruence with them.

Tom learned to face his fears, anger, sadness, & even his joy – going into is feelings fully, accepting them, & taking responsibility for them.

Maybe most importantly, Tom learned of the power and magic of commitment. Energy began to flow through him & from him in ways he had scarcely imagined previously. He became a powerful force for love and positive change within his expanding sphere of influence.